O Style | Why We Need Clothes That Make Us Feel Great
I often hear from clients and friends that they have things in their closet they have never worn or haven’t worn in years. Their rationale is that they’re waiting to get in shape so they can fit into the new clothes or hanging on to old clothes even though they no longer serve them just in case. My thought on that during a closet session is this: when you open your closet in the morning, and you are looking at those pieces you’re “waiting” to wear or wish you could wear, how does that make you feel? Do you feel inspired? Or self-critical? Do you feel confident? Does staring at these items make you feel good?
I understand that sometimes we buy clothing to motivate us to get to that ideal place where we can finally wear them and can feel good about ourselves. However, the way I see it is, there is a much easier way to feel good right now. Take some time to map out your starting steps and small actions you can take to feel good about yourself on the daily: opening your closet to stare at a dress you have never worn or haven’t worn in years because they are several sizes too small is the opposite of encouraging. They will only remind you of all the steps you haven’t taken. Those clothes are going to remind you that you don’t like your body; it’s going to bring up all the self-sabotaging, self-critical, negative voices in your head to come and poke at you. So why not instead turn that around and focus on the things that will make you feel confident and radiant just as you are?
Forget about fitting into that particular beauty standard society has! What if instead of wasting energy worrying how to fit into that dress/suit/jacket/jumpsuit/etc. that you bought on sale last year saying you’ll wear it when you no longer have that muffin top, you spend the time and energy looking for clothes that complement and fit the body you have RIGHT NOW! Think of it as an ongoing experiment: remember to stay curious and be graceful with yourself: experiments are trial and error after all, so don’t be afraid to be a style scientist! Embrace the body you have now, one loving thought at a time. Wear things that will make you feel good now and take the steps that will help you feel confident every day.
Because the bottom line is when you start to focus on doing what it takes to feel great, you’ll begin to celebrate and appreciate what your body helps you do daily. You will begin to feel positive about your body because what’s inside matters first, and then you will radiate on the outside. Imagine feeling amazing inside because you’re doing the work, and then you find the dress or jumpsuit that you love, or you’re wearing that super fine, undeniably flattering LEWK, now THAT creates the whole package!
When we talk about authenticity, it’s impossible to forego the personal in all areas of our lives, because authenticity is honoring where you are now and who you are now. That includes both your qualities and flaws. We all have goals and things we want to work on and be better at emotionally, mentally, and physically. Because we are continually evolving, it’s essential to be mindful of what makes us happy and feel authentic while we’re honoring where we are now. It’s never about perfection.
Now, if you’re someone who is dead-on serious about not spending money on new clothes because you’ve committed to getting healthy and want to wait before you buy, like you’re not changing your mind about this, ever, I’m still going to try to change your mind just a little bit. Because there are always a few options to give you some peace of mind from a financial perspective:
1. Depending on the new piece, you may be able to bring it to a seamstress to have it tailored so it can fit better.
2. You may look into consignment shops in your area that could help sell the lightly worn clothes so you can recoup some of the money. It’s also an excellent way to help the planet.
3. You can schedule a drop-off at a shelter organization that collects used clothes for individuals in need, and in return, you can get a gift receipt letter and write it off on your taxes.
4. Consider renting to experiment with different styles, first. Rent-The-Runway has an every-day- wear-clothing rental section online, and there are also apps like Haverdash and Gwynnie Bee that can help with spicing up your wardrobe without spending full price while trying on new styles.
Long story short, peeps, HAVE. FUN.
Set your own style rules as you evolve. Follow your gut feeling because that is a true sign of your authenticity.